A stunningly beautiful resort, a gut-wrenching history, and an indelible culture all set in the islands of Hilton Head, South Carolina. There was so much to take in, and yet, my eyes were continually drawn to that hammock.

I noticed it the very first day. I thought about what it would feel like to sway my ever-present anxieties away, to rock my constantly worried mind into a seemingly unachievable calming state of rest, to release control and allow myself to be comfortable with the idea that these chords could hold the weight of all life had thrown at me…all that life continued to pummel me with over and over again.

But I didn’t know how. By the second day, I had grown comfortable enough with the safety of my fellow writers to share my ignorance. I so wanted to get inside what I considered to be the embodiment of relaxation. But I didn’t know how. I so wanted to experience the ease and leisure I just knew I would feel as soon as I settled into the external manifestation of sleeping on air. But I didn’t know how. I so wanted to learn the method, the skill, the trick to allowing my body to learn how to maneuver itself into a position that meshed with the shape, that formed with the bends, that moved to the hammock’s rhythm: effortless, eloquent, with ease.

Thankfully, a fellow writer quickly and skillfully taught me how to get in and out of the hammock. It was much easier than I had made it out to be in my mind, as are so many things.

And then I understood. This hammock represented all that I did not allow or make time for. This hammock represented all that I made excuses for. This hammock represented all that I needed, wanted, and desired, and yet all that I subconsciously fought against, consciously struggled with, and now obviously needed to make a priority.

I needed to relax and be at ease.

I needed leisure and sleep.

I needed to allow myself to just… be.

I often close my eyes and go back to how I felt in that hammock. I can almost feel the gentle sway, feel the slight wind, see the blue skies, and slowly hear faint voices that are slipping farther and farther away as I sink into the place I long to be.

Back and forth, back… and forth… back…and… forth…

Selah.